I sent this email to a friend of mine today. The two of us talk a LOT about being true to ourselves and living confidently. After I wrote it, I thought it would make a good blog entry!
I don't know if you've ever noticed this, but sometimes black women are the most confident women you ever run across. Whatever black moms are teaching their daughters, everyone else needs to be doing it!! I've been fortunate to draw some inspiration from a couple of them this week. One of them is a lady who works part-time at the place where I work out. Last night during our workouts, we got to talking about life as usual and how the hard things we've been through have made us who we are. She is 52 (but doesn't look it!) and just went through a breakup of a 3-year relationship she really thought was going somewhere. At first, she was really depressed...and then at some point, she got up and dusted herself off and decided no more tears were being wasted on that man. She went out dancing with her friends and didn't care about being single or trying to meet anyone; she just went and had a fantastic time and let loose on the dance floor. Because of the confidence and the empowered attitude she had, all the guys wanted to dance with her, and she ended up going out with one of them. She was telling me how she got to a place in her life where she just decided she was gonna do what she wanted to do and wasn't going to worry about what anyone thought. She has this real go-getter attitude. She's not arrogant; she's just confident, and she's really okay with who she is.
Then this morning I heard an interview on the radio with Monique about the movie "Precious." (I haven't seen it; have you? I want to but am a little afraid of the onslaught of emotion.) She had exactly the same attitude. They were asking her if she had ever been afraid of not succeeding in her career and things like that, and her answer was always if she didn't succeed, so what? She'd move on to something else and not let it keep her down. Her whole image of herself and what makes her special was so remarkable. I also remember seeing a quote in a magazine by the girl who plays Precious, Gabourey Sebide, where she said:
I don't know if you've ever noticed this, but sometimes black women are the most confident women you ever run across. Whatever black moms are teaching their daughters, everyone else needs to be doing it!! I've been fortunate to draw some inspiration from a couple of them this week. One of them is a lady who works part-time at the place where I work out. Last night during our workouts, we got to talking about life as usual and how the hard things we've been through have made us who we are. She is 52 (but doesn't look it!) and just went through a breakup of a 3-year relationship she really thought was going somewhere. At first, she was really depressed...and then at some point, she got up and dusted herself off and decided no more tears were being wasted on that man. She went out dancing with her friends and didn't care about being single or trying to meet anyone; she just went and had a fantastic time and let loose on the dance floor. Because of the confidence and the empowered attitude she had, all the guys wanted to dance with her, and she ended up going out with one of them. She was telling me how she got to a place in her life where she just decided she was gonna do what she wanted to do and wasn't going to worry about what anyone thought. She has this real go-getter attitude. She's not arrogant; she's just confident, and she's really okay with who she is.
Then this morning I heard an interview on the radio with Monique about the movie "Precious." (I haven't seen it; have you? I want to but am a little afraid of the onslaught of emotion.) She had exactly the same attitude. They were asking her if she had ever been afraid of not succeeding in her career and things like that, and her answer was always if she didn't succeed, so what? She'd move on to something else and not let it keep her down. Her whole image of herself and what makes her special was so remarkable. I also remember seeing a quote in a magazine by the girl who plays Precious, Gabourey Sebide, where she said:
“They try to paint the picture that I was this downtrodden, ugly girl who was unpopular in school and in life, and then I got this role and now I’m awesome...but the truth is that I’ve been awesome, and then I got this role.” She has also said, "One day I decided I was beautiful, and so I carried out my life as if I was a beautiful girl," and, "I think I'm amazing and awesome. But I think everyone is."
Then the Tyra episode with Isis (the first transgender Top Model - rock on!) came on again, so I watched part of it. She was homeless and living on the street, but when she got an opportunity to be in the background during a Top Model photo shoot, she just decided to WORK it, and she became almost an overnight star. She just had this outlook like, "This is me; you like it or you don't, but I like it fine."
Don't you want to live that way? How liberating!
What do you do to inspire more confidence in yourself?
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